thoughts on motherhood

We were over at the Vogels last night and Rachel and I were discussing motherhood and all that it entails. She said something really powerful that I had never thought about before. She told me to think about the kind of child I want to raise and the person that I want my child to become...and then to become that myself. I have to be whatever it is I expect of my children. If I want them to be lovers of God's Word, I have to love it. If I want them to be tender-hearted and forgiving, I have to be that first. It may sound really obvious or simple, but I was totally humbled as I realized that my children will be little walking reflections of me. And if I am not reflecting the character of Christ, I cannot think that all the training and teaching and discipling will make up for the lack of godliness in my own life. So it's not that I want to have all these Christ-like characteristics merely so I can pass them on to my children; I want to have them because my love for God requires nothing less. But it is helpful to have the perspective that recognizes I can only lead my children as far as I have been. I have a long way to go.